Breathe, relax and focus for a moment. When negativity seems to abound and you feel like you could sing the blues with the rest of them, take a step back. Upon finding myself alone in a foreign country (Sweden), and having just been broken up with by the man of my dreams (yes, my own personal version of my Brad Pitt), I had a lot of time to sit around and sulk. It was a VERY small town in Sweden and I had more than a few hours to kill. Yikes! What’s a girl to do?

The first thought that comes to mind- I need to cry, I want to cry, why am I not crying? I do not know anyone here, I need to get back to the US, and IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING? Well, I chalk it up to the strength of a woman combined with enough post-relationship analysis I am a self-proclaimed expert at this point. The following method got me through one of my most challenging moments, and I hope it helps my fellow lady friends all over, heaven forbid they encounter a similar situation. Whether your career is stagnant after you have given beyond your best, you have lost someone dear to your heart (deceased or living) or a chain of unfortunate events have presented themselves to your life all at once, fear not. It may take some time and practice but the following combination will surely ease your burden and put the whole quandary into perspective.

Contact a friend or family member as soon as you feel you are at your emotional capacity. This can be a best friend, parent, sibling or partner. Chances are, someone close to you has your best intentions at heart and wants what is best for you. Plus they can step outside the situation and recommend less emotional measures even if you want to pick up and move to a remote island to teach scuba diving for the next year.

Ensure you are in a safe environment. You need to go to a place where your stress is reduced not heightened. This allows both your mind and body to breathe a little bit so your focus becomes more clear. This does not mean taking a double margarita as your companion on a solo drive “so you can relax” while listening to sad songs. Put your favorite pjs on, light some candles and listen to a relaxing playlist from your iTunes library. If you prefer not to be alone go to a friends house (make sure it is a positive person who always knows how to make you smile).

Grab a piece of paper and jot down at least ten things you are thankful for. Although it may seem like the world has come crashing down there are plenty of reasons to be thankful. Perhaps you lost your job. Now you have the world at your fingertips! Go pursue what you have always wanted to do even if it involves a totally different career path. If you are paralyzed by the loss of your one and only ( I can identify, as I wondered why this happened to me in southern Sweden on a cold, rainy day on what was supposed to be my romantic vacation), focus on all your wonderful traits and realize that for every door that closes, hundreds more open. Remember the saying there are plenty of fish in the sea? Well, one walk through the Copenhagen airport and I realized there are plenty of male-fishies just waiting to be fished by a confident lady!

Write down your goals. This may seem like a redundant exercise but jotting down your aspiration puts you one step closer to having the life you have dreamed about. Dream big as you like, but also keep the list within reason. You want to set goals you can attain and feel proud of. Maybe you want to speak another language or take that weekend trip with your best friend. Go for it! Dedicate time to nourish your needs and wants, and I promise you will not be disappointed.

Get thee to the bookstore. Immediately go to the section that inspires you. Grab your favorite cup of joe and dive into the fanciful world of books. One of my best friends swears by the women’s self-help section every time she hits a major bump in the road. Topics include women that have achieved the impossible, lived life to the fullest and challenged the status quo. You cannot tell me it is not fun to identify with women who rose above trials and tribulations and smile all the while.

Exercise. Nothing can replace exercise when it comes to physical and mental health. Aside from boosting endorphins, increasing serotonin, aiding digestion and other physical bonuses (such as slipping back into your skinny jeans), it just plain makes you feel like the hot goddess you are! My best friend is a die-hard marathon runner and swears by it. She used to leave voicemails forcing me to get out of bed and meet her at our apartment gym to chat while jogging on the treadmill. At the time I hated it and repeatedly explained that I enjoy sports and sprinting, NOT distance running. Five years later I run weekly and have completed several half marathons that make me feel like Wonder Woman. So whether you need to find your center of balance doing downward dog or want to take your frustrations out on the punching bag in your kickboxing class, make a habit out of sweating. I promise it will empower your body and spirit even on the days you cannot find your rose colored glasses.

In sum, no matter what lemons life has thrown your way be sure to follow this simple set of go-to’s when you are down in the dumps. Throughout history, women have not only endured and survived but blossomed and thrived. Every day you wake up is a new day and the world is your oyster. Throw open the curtains, take your glass half full and make yourself proud!

In 2005, the NBA implemented a dress code that must be followed by every player and member from each basketball organization. Under this rule, appropriate attire is limited to suits, sport coats, or other casual business clothing. During games, players that are injured or not going to play must wear appropriate clothing, and during press conferences and other basketball-related public appearances, players and staff members must follow the dress code. I don’t think this will improve the image of professional basketball. Fans and supporters care about the games or their favorite player’s performance, not how well they dress. Basketball is a form of entertainment for fans and the general public. Yes, there have been a few examples of bad publicity for the NBA, such as the Kobe Bryant rape case and fights during several games. These incidents do occur and it is up to the individual player to restore their image. The league will move on and the fans will continue to follow the sport.

More importantly, the dress code may promote superficial and biased stereotypes towards players and fans. The message is that nice attire will deter crime, negative looks or appearances and trouble from NBA players. Basically, the NBA doesn’t want to have a dangerous image. Many players have merchandise or product deals with companies that have strong hip-hop connections. By dressing in hip-hop or street clothes, the league feels it would show inappropriate behavior and set bad examples for kids and adults. This is a stereotype and offensive to certain ethnicities, cultures, and music and entertainment supporters. It’s saying all members of these groups are negative influences and people shouldn’t be like them. Why does the NBA take this stance when they use hip-hop to promote their own events, like the All-Star game? Being hypocritical doesn’t prove anything and only causes more trouble. Better attire doesn’t mean better performances for players, so why not just let them do their jobs. If the NBA wants to improve its image, then that is fine, but do it in a way that has a lasting and productive effect.

By Chad Fukuoka (as acquired from CollegeColosseum.com)