Let’s face it: Valentine’s Day was designed for women. Since most guys could care less about mushy cards, candles, chocolates and flowers, women need to think a little differently when romancing their men. This Valentine’s Day, keep a few candles burning for yourself if you’d like, but if you really want him to feel the love and know that you appreciate him, here are some ways to turn your home into a guy-friendly romantic escape. Have a clean apartment and get a baby sitter While most guys could care less about candles and soft music, they do appreciate a clean house.  Pick up your things... 

In an unprecedented move, the Obama administration announced today that it was canceling Valentine’s Day in 2010. In an afternoon news conference, held ironically enough in the Rose Garden, the President and Treasury Secretary Geithner somberly explained their rational. “The economy is in freefall and millions of Americans are in danger of losing their homes.  We need people to focus and to spend money on the things that matter most, not on frivolous boxes of chocolates and superfluous bouquets of roses” said Geithner. However, in a shocking snafu that is sure to make its way onto YouTube... 

With bated breath.  Man, I should have made that the title of this column.  But then people would have wondered what happened to my promise to publish the story finalists.  Kind of like people are wondering what happened to Obama’s promise to not hire lobbyists or people who didn’t pay taxes.  Don’t get me wrong, I am still an Obamaphile, but come on, it can’t be that hard to find a tax paying cabinet nominee…can it? I have a good solution for this that I’d like to propose.  Who remembers Robin Hood Prince of Thieves?  Great movie, mediocre accents.  Yes, that one.  So Robin... 

Call me old-fashioned, but I still think Valentine’s Day should be about romance. But that doesn’t mean you have to stick to the usual Valentine’s clichés to do it right. For me, nothing is less romantic than aping exactly what everyone else is doing. Roses are beautiful, but there are 364 other days in the year to buy roses. (Hint boys: If you really want to woo your lady, bring her flowers when she isn’t expecting it). Valentine’s Day dinner is your perfect opportunity to get creative. When most people think of a romantic meal they envision a fancy French restaurant with candles, snooty... 

The day is fast approaching.  No, not the winter equinox.  Wait, maybe the winter equinox is fast approaching.  But that’s not the one I’m talking about.  I mean the day of pink cards and Cupidian arrows, of little red chalky hearts with amorous phrases etched in white, of romance and candles and flowers and candies, of raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens.  Yes, we are T-minus 10 days or so until Valentine’s Day or, as Hallmark calls it, Payday. Last year I wrote a perhaps at times satirical piece about the “L-word” to mark the occasion.  But this year I am going to let you...